A Thrill Is Not Running Down My Leg

A Thrill Is Not Running Down My Leg

It's come to my attention that "bad things happen to good people,"
but in the case of Barack Obama, who knew that the 59 million people
who managed to buck the influence of ACORN and withhold their
allegiance would have it so bad. I tried during the campaign to
dissent, to assert to whomever would listen that just because McCain,
with his caved-in skull, rejected "the politics of personal
destruction," didn't mean that Obama lacked socialist flair. But time
after time, I was told "it's not true." Friend after friend threw
Bush in my face, corroborating anger with articles from Rolling Stone
(that icon of journalism) and Obama stickers on my car. Now, when I
see those friends (rarely), the conversation is shallow ("How are
you?" "How do you think I am!"), and awkwardness, where before there
was ease, engenders the atmosphere of a dental office waiting room.
Do I miss their lockstep, head-in-the-clouds "kindness"?
Not really—you can't help people who support spending to end debt,
lying to pass laws, and yelling to mute facts. The other day, I
passed a liberal getting out of his car. A Volvo (what else?), the
bumper sported anti-Bush stickers, and in passing, I asked how he
thought the president was doing. His answer? First, he used
"impossible" to delineate the challenge of the office, but, in his
view, Obama and his family were "wonderful." He particularly liked
that he'd planted a garden at the White House.
That's right—nothing on the passing of an unread bill
(Waxman-Markley) that destroys our ability to compete against China,
nothing on a rogue dictator (Ahmadinejad) getting a pass after slaying
protestors of a fixed election, nothing on single-payer health care
from the Haywire Kooks who send tax dollars to corpses…. No, the
thing that stuck out, and mattered, was herbs. Herbs.
I was reminded of the quote, "The hottest place in Hell is reserved
for those who remain neutral in times of moral struggle" (Martin
Luther King Jr.) and saw this soft-hearted, "kumbayah"-singing Dem
spoon-tarring roofs while draped in the flag. Indeed, with such
sweeping legislation being jammed down the throats (and wallets) of
the American people in the hope that ignorance of the president's
ideology will foster subservience to bureaucratic control, it's
difficult to argue against "moral struggle," harder still to believe
that the Garden of Eden doesn't have roots pointed toward Hell.
That said, he was "nice." So nice (hateful bumper sticker
notwithstanding) that I imagined Hizb-ut Tahrir, the terrorist
organization that recently met at the Oak Park Hilton to discuss "The
End of Democracy" and "The Rise of Islam in America," inviting him to
join such prestigious alums as Khalid Sheik Mohammed, the mastermind
of 9-11, and Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, now dead (thanks to the man on the
bumper-sticker), in an effort to bring Caliphate to his hometown.
Caliphate, for those who aren't Islamic wack-jobs whose goal is to
make every man, woman and child "subservient to Allah," would depress
home prices even further and, in all likelihood, have an adverse
effect on the timely production of "American Idol" come fall.
Unlikely? Granted…. But in the era of Hope and Change, political
correctness accommodates terror, while big, amorphous, indefinable
concepts— "renewable energy," "climate change," "universal
coverage"—flout detail. Why bother? The gamut of challenges facing
the nation can be summarized not in educational minutiae but in
strolling minstrels "whistling past the graveyard" to the new national
anthem, "Slip-sliding Away."
Question. Does anyone, having considered this man, believe he
comprehends (or cares to comprehend) proposed legislation that may
CRIMINALIZE food-gardening? That's right, after you retrieve your
jaw, know that HR 875, The Food Safety Modernization Act, may limit
food-growing privileges to corporate giants whose lobbying efforts can
be traced to Monsanto (Rosa DeLauro, D-CN, the bill's sponsor, is
married to Stan Greenberg, a political strategist and Monsanto
client). The legislation seeks to destroy, under the guise of "food
safety," the fundamental right to live off the land, free of
corporatism, and provide for oneself. Who sponsors the bill?
Democrats. (Forty-two of them, not a single Republican.) Who is the
F.D.A.'s de facto Food Czar? Why none other than Michael Taylor,
former executive and chief lobbyist for…. Monsanto! Foisted in the
onerous lawyerese (section 206) are the conforming requirements of
"food production facilities." Nebulous and, if you'll excuse the
expression, "full of fertilizer," "food production facility" is
purposely vague. Less vague is the consequence of non-compliance.
Section 402:

The Administrator shall have the authority to administratively detain
and seize any food regulated under this Act that the Administrator has
reason to believe is unsafe, is adulterated, or otherwise fails to
meet the regulation of the food safety law.

Also from section 402:
The Administrator shall provide by regulation for procedures to
institute a seizure action on an expedited basis with respect to
perishable food.

Perishable food? Last time I checked, ALL food was perishable. One
is left wonder to what degree of compliance the White House garden may
be subjected. It is, after all, a "food production facility."
A chill, not a thrill, is running down my leg.

Greg Halvorson
9643 N. Kellogg
Portland, OR 97203
503 869-3288
gchalv@gmail.com